The Poor Man has some advice for the Algore's new synapse-burst, that Anti-Fox, Liberal Teevee Channel thing. (You know -- to combat all the right-wing Republican-adoring tv channels... all three of them: Fox, Pax and that other Godstuff channel with the people with the big frozen hair and the starving children -- which to fit with the other two should be called Shux, or maybe Styx). Anyway, here is a sample of his advice:
2) No Bill Moyers - I'm sure Bill Moyers is a really nice guy, and really smart and thoughtful fellow and all that, but he really sucks, and he needs to be kept off TV. Snipers need to be posted with tranquilizer darts and guard dogs need to be given scaps of his old Bill Cosby Collection sweaters to sniff and ordered to attack on sight. Look at that show NOW, and look what he's done with it - a bunch of earnest driver's ed videos about how Bush is destroying the country, followed by in-depth analysis by Barbara Kingsolver. It's unwatchable. It's like you're six years old again and have to sit quietly like a gentlemen while your old aunties discuss what kind of cassarole they are bringing to the church luncheon.
It's all good advice -- yes, even having Al Franken paired up with John Jon* Stewart. Stewart would make Franken look like a soured has-been, and the shock might actually drop-kick him into actually attempting to be funny instead of coasting on his former association with SNL.
The PM forgot one essential thing, though: keep Gore, and for dog's sake keep Tipper, far away from the camera. That pair has driven more people to tick off "Republican" or "Independent" on their voter's registration forms than a thousand stained blue dresses.
*Gary Farber says it's "Jon" so I will believe him. I could just look it up on the Comedy Channel website, couldn't I? Okay, It's Jon. Hey, I could have spelled his last name "Stuart" too.
Posted by Andrea Harris at June 22, 2003 12:00 AMJon Stewart.
Jon Stewart is the guy who had the tv show, and does the tv show.
John Stewart is the Green Lantern who wasn't Hal Jordan or Kyle Rayner (or C'hpp or Kilgore or any of the others).
HTH! Love ya!
Posted by: Gary Farber at June 23, 2003 at 01:49 AMYou know, I was going to type out "Jon," but then I noticed that Andrew used "John," (see the post) so I thought "Have I been wrong all these years?" That shows you what happens when you trust another person's spelling.
Posted by: Andrea Harris at June 23, 2003 at 01:56 AMIt's more confusing now the Justice League cartoons are on. Jon Stewart AND John Stewart are both on TV? The cable world isn't big enough for that!
Posted by: Thad at June 23, 2003 at 11:08 AM