November 08, 2004

GROW UP

High school obsessive Maureen Dowd once again analyses current events from her trademark Wonder Years point of view:

Just how much did Karl Rove hate not being one of the cool guys in high school in the 60's? Enough to hatch schemes to marshal the forces of darkness to take over the country?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, please. And check out Maureen's latest crackling wordplay:

Instead of the New Frontier, Karl and W. offer the New Backtier.

Hey, MoDo -- instead of high school, maybe they went to low school!

Posted by Tim Blair at November 8, 2004 12:03 PM
Comments

If there every was an uncool guy in high school, it was Kerry. He was the ugliest teenager I have ever seen.

Posted by: jake at November 8, 2004 at 12:07 PM

In the big picture, Who.Gives.A.S--t, what Mo Do the DoDo thinks.

Posted by: joe at November 8, 2004 at 12:12 PM

This is exactly what I've been saying about MoDo all along: she is a snotty seventh-grader making fun of all the uncool kids in her class. It was mighty considerate of her to prove my point for me, right up front like that.

Posted by: Annalucia at November 8, 2004 at 12:13 PM

Maureen Dowd's mental powers are truly amazing. She knows that Karl Rove wasn't one of the cool guys in high school She knows that it still bothers him today, although he graduated from high school more than thirty-five years ago, and she knows that it's what motivates everything he does.

Me, I don't know, but I certainly do wonder whether Ms. Dowd is telling us a whole lot more about herself than about Karl Rove.

Posted by: Silicon Valley Jim at November 8, 2004 at 12:15 PM

Most of the cool guys I went to school with went on to be cool car salesmen and cool city employees while the uncool students are now uncool doctors and very uncool engineers. Both groups managed to avoid the mind-dulling occupation of editorial writer though.

"Instead of the New Frontier, Karl and W. offer the New Backtier". What a witty knee slapper. I wonder what the NYT pays a writer like that?

Posted by: Arty at November 8, 2004 at 12:30 PM

MoDo was on Meet the Press Sunday morning, and started to verbally wander off into fantasy land. I thought we might get a "stolen election" out of her, or even something akin to Bill Moyer's coup theory, advanced on the Charlie Rose Show last week, but being on the same panel with Bill Safire seemed to make Maureen reign in her more Krugmanesque instincts (as opposed to Paul himself, who did no such thing when Tim Russert had him on with Bill O'Reiley back in September).

Posted by: John at November 8, 2004 at 12:32 PM

Looks like MoDo wants to ensure that the stupidity quotient on the NYT Op-Ed page is going to remain constant despite Paul Krugman's leave of absence, so she's upped her own insane ramblings.

Posted by: PW at November 8, 2004 at 12:34 PM

sorry to be OT, but anyone speaking dutch care to help out with translating whats on this site?
Cyber Djihad --in Dutch--

Posted by: noname at November 8, 2004 at 12:35 PM

Arty
For that effort, they probably threw her some fruit along with her usual handful of peanuts

Posted by: FusterCluck at November 8, 2004 at 12:36 PM

Sounds like the cool kids missed an opportunity. They shoulda hooked up with Karl when they had the chance.

Posted by: richard mcenroe at November 8, 2004 at 12:40 PM

MoDo's babbling on about "black-and-white Manichaean values" in a column where she paints all Democrats (William Jennings Bryan???) as holy and all Republicans as evil means that she has finally put herself into reflexive self-parody. No one takes her seriously any more, not even herself.

Posted by: DarthVAda at November 8, 2004 at 12:47 PM

Arty: I think you and I went to the same low school. Why just the other day The coolest kid in the class of 1977 changed the oil in my car.

We need to do some research on MoDo's low school years.

Posted by: Tej at November 8, 2004 at 12:48 PM

Dowd used to use a typewriter, but now she uses a typewronger.

Posted by: Jim Treacher at November 8, 2004 at 12:58 PM

Remember Dowd telling us Kerry should be President because he's a good debater and Bush is not? Now she says Rove is an evil manipulator because he was a good debater.

Good thing Bush didn't fall for that one!

Posted by: A at November 8, 2004 at 12:58 PM

Evidently, MoDo thought she was the prettiest and most entitled girl in HS. Nevertheless, due to the uncool, homophobic and religious republicans in her HS, she was neither considered for homecoming queen, nor asked to the senior prom. Clearly, years of therapy have yet to heal her wounds and she still lashes out at those she believes, in her twisted way, thwarted her destiny.

Posted by: perfectsense at November 8, 2004 at 01:00 PM

Treacher's on to something. Maybe she should try a kindwriter?

Posted by: A at November 8, 2004 at 01:05 PM

People, MoDo is jealous. All the uncool high school kids are succeeding, while she and fellow cool high school comrades are a bunch of losers. I mean, look at it! MoDo backs Senator Kerry, KKKarl Rove backs President Bush. Who wins? KKKarl!!!!

Her problem is really basic. A smart (but uncool) person who realize, "Oh, wow, I messed up! What is KKKarl doing right, and how can I use his formula for success?"

But to emulate KKKarl means she must Cross The Line From Cool To Uncool. MoDo Uncool? Perish the thought! Hence the rage translated into insanity. A classic case of self-inflicted guilt.

Of course, this also implies that MoDo is smart, which is doubt. Which means that she is just plain nuts.....

Posted by: The Real JeffS at November 8, 2004 at 01:17 PM

This is one of those wonderful leftist projections. Everything I hate about myself I put on you. Has anyone noticed how the left (both here and in the US) having lost an election where they tried by every means possible to vilify, denigrate and belittle anyone who even thought of voting for Howard or Bush now claim that the winners MUST unite what the losers divided. If you feel alienated its probably because you have cut yourself off from the majority. Alternatively its about admitting you lost the battle but refusing to admit you lost the war... as long as the winners carry out the loser's policies all will be well. NOT. Stick to your guns John and Dubya.

Posted by: Daemon at November 8, 2004 at 01:24 PM

Maureen Dowd is rapidly approaching what I used to call the "outstrip factor."

Let me explain--in the late 90s, i was doing ok as a comedy writer. At the time, Bill Clinton was in a world of pain viz. the Starr Report.

Soon after that was released, replete with tails of blowjobs and semen-stain became the new yadayada, making jokes about anyhting like that became...unfunny.

If you're a comedy writer and the Starr report is dirtier and more dangerous than you can be, you are screwed. In short, the reality of Clinton had outstripped our ability to make fun of him successfully.

SHe is becoming so bad, so completely structurally detached from the mechanics of obervation, that she cannot be parodied.

Posted by: rod at November 8, 2004 at 01:26 PM

MoDoPe

Posted by: guinsPen at November 8, 2004 at 01:27 PM

"Maureen Dowd is a Washington, D. C. native. She received her B.A. degree in English literature from Catholic University in Washington in 1973"

The Nuns didn't teach her about morals?

"I'm just so glad to be out west. Back east, we're dealing with charges and counter-charges, accusations of incompetence, a whisper campaign....But look, enough about the New York Times and the Pulitzer board."

From a speech in Denver 2000

"People once told me that winning the Pulitzer would change my life. I envisioned a cascade of men, money, exclusive interviews, respect. But it hasn't happened"

Wonder why that didn't happen?

"We work in a very weird business where sometimes our best professional moments are someone else's worst personal moments."

On the other hand sometimes her worst professional moments are someone elses best personal moments....like today for example.

"....I would drive around in the car, around and around the block. Usually, I would just put my head on the steering wheel and wish I had a different personality."

I wonder if she still wonders about her personality....somethings never change I expect.

and she's caring

a trouble maker maybe

Posted by: tej at November 8, 2004 at 01:29 PM

From a friend of her(s)to me;
'I am absolutly sure that she hates herself"
Me: I have more respect of a two bit call girl than a left wing pimp with no beliefs,
Just a ho with words to sell!!

Posted by: DNAZ at November 8, 2004 at 01:57 PM

dnaz -words almost fail me but...
...what a fucking moron you are

unbelievable

so this is tim blair's following
sad sad sad

Posted by: neddy at November 8, 2004 at 02:54 PM

Thank you Neddy, for your breathtakingly stupid analysis!

You are a credit to the left.

Posted by: Quentin George at November 8, 2004 at 03:36 PM

Of course, she uses a typelefter.

Posted by: ray at November 8, 2004 at 03:45 PM

Waitaminute! She graduated college in 1973 and she's *still* obsessing over "coolness" and personal popularity *anywhere*, let alone in *high school*? @_@

I'd have to say that she's found a level of shallowness that is so profound as to come out the opposite end and transform into incredible depth of character were such a thing possible. How did she go about aging 35 years without ever becoming an adult? ^_^;

Posted by: Small Pink Mouse at November 8, 2004 at 05:25 PM

Good one, ray.

"Instead of the New Frontier, Karl and W. offer the New Backtier."

That's not punditry, that's slapstickditry!!

( God, I'm good. )

Next?

Posted by: zeppenwolf at November 8, 2004 at 06:21 PM

Backtier,
Wasn't he deported with his family back to Pakistan after customs found out he payed people smugglers to pass him off as an Afghan?

Posted by: gubbaboy at November 8, 2004 at 08:14 PM

Karl Rove??

I call him Karl Standstill

Can someone tell me how to do italics here??

Posted by: jlchydro at November 8, 2004 at 10:03 PM

Karl Rove??

I call him Karl Standstill

Can someone tell me how to do italics here??

Posted by: jlchydro at November 8, 2004 at 10:04 PM

Someone needs to start disclosing the education levels of some of these 'superior' journalists/commentators.

Posted by: davod at November 8, 2004 at 10:13 PM

A similar screed against Peggy Noonan here..

http://www.zianet.com/insightanalytical/peggy.htm

The problem is that the "cool ones" think the world owes them a living. The rest of us work for our success...

Posted by: Nancy Reyes at November 8, 2004 at 11:18 PM

Instead of MoDo, we should call her DoNoMo.

Posted by: Jim Treacher at November 8, 2004 at 11:34 PM

Typical MoDo - resorting to self-absorbed tantrums and name calling. I wonder if the State of Connecticut lets her in on weekends.

Posted by: Joe N. at November 9, 2004 at 12:30 AM

Do you think someone should tell Maureen that she's eally beautiful when she's bitter and twisted?

Posted by: Craig at November 9, 2004 at 12:59 AM

Backtieral Culture wins!

Prepare to infect the blue states!

Posted by: Fred at November 9, 2004 at 02:15 AM

Just goes to illustrate why they don't let high schoolers vote. Their judgement is suspect.
The coolest guy in the Siloam Springs H.S. class of '79 (besides my own very cool self)is currently on wife #3 and "between jobs".

Posted by: Doc at November 9, 2004 at 02:40 AM

Maureen Dowd on Chris Matthews Sunday: was she drunk or severely hangover. She was mumbling something about hypocrites going to hell. She kept putting her hand over her face like she new her breath reeked and her eyes didn't focus on anything. She was kind turned sideways so as not to either a) breathe on Chris or b) avoid his spittle as it might have sent her over the edge of nausea, causing her to worship the porcelain God. Anybody hear anything?

Posted by: Hudson at November 9, 2004 at 02:47 AM

Queasy-MoDo is pissed off because the closest she got to getting "any" in high school was when the nerd who sat behind her in freshman biology snapped her bra strap once and never took it any further...

Posted by: Texas Kid at November 9, 2004 at 05:37 AM

Saw her on Rose and Letterman while she was hawking her book. I had never seen her and I just couldn't help wondering who the f'ed-up redhead was. And why the hell was she on TV. She's articulate compared to Bush?

Best line, from Rose (nobody would say it in front of an audience) "I always wanted to be America's sweetheart" Think there's room for analysis over that one, Dr. Freud?

Posted by: chicago mike at November 9, 2004 at 05:39 AM

I don't care what any of you say, I think that Maureen Dowd is hot.

She's also a truly warm and caring human being who brings me milk of magnesia when I'm under a lot of stress.

Posted by: Paul Krugman at November 9, 2004 at 06:06 AM

Damn you, Krugman, now you got me jealous! I agree - that Dowdy girl is one fine piece o' tail!

Posted by: bob herbert at November 9, 2004 at 11:21 AM