Archive for the 'Stupid' Category

Mrs. Jellyby lives

Saturday, December 24th, 2005

All I can do is repeat the headline: Chatroom ‘friend’ takes all mother has using online money-order scheme. Now she can’t pay her rent, and she and her kids might be out on the street for the holidays. Well, not now that her sob story has been put on the internet, and I’m sure that […]

‘Tis the season to make nitpicky moralistic judgments on others who make us feel obscurely guilty

Monday, December 12th, 2005

The Pope is always a reliable punching bag for tired snarks of this sort. I could go into a discussion on how the fancy robes aren’t really “his” the way, say, Madonna’s current supply of fancy designer “Mom™” outfits are hers, so complaining that he makes speeches about observing Christmas in a less-commercial, more-religious way […]

If an actress poops in the woods, does it make any noise?

Monday, December 12th, 2005

I’m so out of the loop since I quit watching MTV back in, oh, 1995 — I had no idea that they had a show as deliciously retarded as “Trippin’,” or as I am going to call it from now on “Celebrity Caca.” They’re up to episode 110! A gaggle of celebs descend upon Tanzania. […]

How moonbats give thanks

Saturday, November 26th, 2005

They pretend that grilled salmon (no doubt nice, neat fillets from a store package), salad, and lentils is an “authentic Iraqi meal” and eat it instead of turkey to make some sort of point that is frankly lost on me. Are they saying that the Iraqis are suffering because they don’t eat turkey and sweet […]

Stereotypes abounding

Tuesday, November 15th, 2005

This strikes me as a really stupid statement:
Does anyone else find it odd that conservatives — the staunch upholders of history and tradition — typically live in and defend decidedly newfangled suburbs, while liberals — the bold advocates of progressive change — typically live in and defend decidedly old-fashioned neighborhoods? I’ve never been able to […]

Fibsk

Sunday, November 13th, 2005

What kind of journalist can live without LexisNexis? A bad one, that’s what.

“Cancel Christmas!”

Thursday, November 10th, 2005

Various communities in the UK would like everyone to experience the Mood of Their Choice At An Unspecified Season for Some Reason, but not in public, because that would not be Diverse™. It was then that I had my brainstorm. It took less than five seconds to type my request into the Google search box. […]

Just thought you’d like to know

Wednesday, November 9th, 2005

The song that has been in my head all day is the Psychedelic Furs’ “Dumbwaiter.” No, I don’t know why, but I am thinking of visiting Walmart’s hardware section and buying an electric drill. Or digging up the old cassette tape that has the song on it (playing it about five times will cure this […]

Cancel the War!

Monday, November 7th, 2005

Burt Bacharach has spoken.
Dear Artists, Musicians, and Celebrities of all stripes:
SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT […]

Incoming crap

Thursday, November 3rd, 2005

Another reason to avoid the wasteland of tedious “ironic” hipcool metatoon garbage known as the Cartoon Network’s “Adult Swim”: the ridiculous “Scare the Squares” promotion given to the upcoming animated version of the comic strip “Boondocks.” Behold:
We just thought we should let you know
This whole Boondocks thing
which premieres November 6th
is TV-MA.
Which doesn’t just mean it’s […]