The Spleenville HQ Chronicles

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Sunday, September 27, 2009

These are not the Goths we knew

More proof that I was smart to get out of the goth scene when I did: just look at these two. No, not the Romulan and the Klingon on the left, nor the two betazoid males in the back—I’m talking about the blond and the brunette gothettes in the long black dresses. What the hell, heroines?

Goth girl on the right at least has most of the Fat Goth Girl look down pat, though a completist would complain about the missing lipstick in the obligatory shade of vampire red, necrotic purple, or black. But Blondie really needs help—no makeup (that I can see, anyway), and that hair… style? She didn’t even try. I’ll bet she normally doesn’t go about all in black like sis (blond goth chicks usually dye their hair black or flaming red or something fluorescent from the Manic Panic line), but she decided to dress up like her for the photo shoot as a lark; it’s the embarrassed smirk that gives her away.

I don’t know—when I was a regular at the Kitchen Club I got used to a higher standard of goth. Some of the girls there had made their elaborate, Bride of Dracula Victorian dresses themselves. Then Hot Topic moved into town, and suddenly there was an inundation of wannabes in matching Marilyn Manson t-shirts and Nightmare Before Christmas striped stockings and I stopped going to clubs and moved out of Miami.

The goth scene is still around (undead is its trademark, after all), but it’s clearly past even its rigor mortis stage and the skeleton is starting to crumble into dust. One more thing bothers me: could they at least have stood up straight? Yes, I’ve turned into my grandmother, all of a sudden, though the goth “I’m with my mundane relatives” slump is de rigueur for family photo ops. Still, I now find it irritating. Years later they’ll look at this old photo and cringe in a different sort of embarrassment.

(Via Instapundit.)

Posted by Andrea Harris on 09/27 at 10:40 AM
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