February 26, 2003

An Immodest Proposal

As a counteraction to the recent "Naked Peace Protests" Michele is pondering a gesture of support for our troops. This gesture is not without historical precedent:

Tradition says that armies already wavering and giving way have been rallied by women who, with earnest entreaties and bosoms laid bare, have vividly represented the horrors of captivity, which the Germans fear with such extreme dread on behalf of their women, that the strongest tie by which a state can be bound is the being required to give, among the number of hostages, maidens of noble birth. They even believe that the sex has a certain sanctity and prescience, and they do not despise their counsels, or make light of their answers. In Vespasian's days we saw Veleda, long regarded by many as a divinity. In former times, too, they venerated Aurinia, and many other women, but not with servile flatteries, or with sham deification. -- Tacitus, Germania.

Posted by Andrea Harris at February 26, 2003 10:33 AM
Comments

Andrea, I have to go to the store for more ointment. Can you come over and babysit Guy Cabot for a while?

Posted by: Steve H. at February 26, 2003 at 10:41 AM

Gotta go to class. Why don't you do what his mother usually does and chain him to the waterpipe with a bag of potato chips and a Diet Coke within reach? (Don't forget the diaper.)

Posted by: Andrea Harris at February 26, 2003 at 11:31 AM

Tsk, tsk, tsk. How sexist. Really now, I'm surprised.

;-)

Posted by: Dean Esmay at February 26, 2003 at 01:59 PM

How is he going to eat the chips if I gag him with a diaper?

Posted by: Steve H. at February 26, 2003 at 03:48 PM

You could always put them in the diaper.

Posted by: Rita at February 26, 2003 at 04:08 PM

This is one baby Rita won't steal.

Posted by: Steve H. at February 26, 2003 at 07:54 PM

A Guy Cabot infestation can usually be remedied by frequent and diligent spraying. It may also help to sprinkle oxalic acid powder in those dark, empty spaces.

Guy and I have had this ongoing discussion wherein he insists that not only did Bush cause the stock market to die a full year before taking office, but he caused the economy to peak six months before any of his budgetary measures could possibly have begun to take effect. Guy seems to think this is perfectly reasonable. I on the other hand have issues with that his argument is not causal and it's contradicted by the evidence he offers in support of it. Other than that, though, he's a swell guy.

Did he call you a "mouth-breather" yet? Every time I inadvertently breathe through my mouth, I'm overcome with guilt and shame, just because of him.

Posted by: David Perron at February 27, 2003 at 05:17 AM